In as much as I believe God places people in our lives by himself, I also believe there is a place of intentionality and effort when it comes to making friends and sustaining friendships and any other type of relationship (even the one we have with our parents)
How many friends would you still have if you did not stop communicating?
How many relationships have you lost today because you both decided to wake up one morning and act as if no one existed.
How many friendships have been lost because of the refusal to say “hi”, “How are you doing” “longtime” “Congratulations” etc.
How many destiny relationships would we have had if we communicated how much we admired a person or a person's gift rather than been a silent fan?
How many sisters would we have if we took out a few minutes from our day to know why a person looked unhappy or why they were crying and then encourage them?
How many more acquaintances would we have if we did not stop saying hi or good morning because we felt it was awkward.
When you had an opportunity to get someone something because they randomly told you they needed it, why did you hold yourself back? Was it because you suddenly felt that you guys weren't close enough?
Remember when you wanted to hug that person, why did you restrain yourself?
When you felt strongly in your spirit to confess how much someone meant to you, why did you stop yourself, oh you didn't want to look weak right?
When she posted that cute picture, when she posted her wins, when she posted that funny meme and deep down you wanted to reply her, why did you stop yourself? Was it because you didn't want her to think you were a famzer (lol). Or maybe you were thinking to yourself “Me and this babe wey no dey talk before”.
For some weird reason, this person has been on your mind all day long, why didn't you check up on her, call her, text her or at least pray for her
I believe in boundaries, that is knowing the difference between a close friend, casual friend, acquaintance etc. And therefore the amount of energy that should be invested into all these different relationships.
But there is something wrong with always holding back. Holding back a hug, advice, a positive comment, a pleasantry, or may be sharing a laugh, in the name of, we are not close biko.
Just like you don't know the potential of any gift or talent until you have taken out time to nurture and grow it, is the same way you don't know the potential of any relationship until you are willing to let your guard down and do what your heart is telling you to do for a person.
Acquaintance can become besties
Enemies can even become friends.
There are people that ideally you guys should have been close but, pride and fear made you loose out on a beautiful relationship with them
Do you know the people that win?
The ones who are not afraid to express their love to people (friends, strangers, acquaintances etc.).
Apostle Femi Lazarus said, it is not enough to feel like you love or know that you love a person, you have to express it.
I remember one day receiving a text from someone where she told me how much she was grateful for having a friend like me. I was in a space in my life at that time when I was feeling like the most selfish person who did not care about anyone, and then this message came in, and I was so happy. At least, I have made an impact in this person's live.
Genuinely, I didn't think me and her were that close, we spoke a lot, but I didn't think she even considered me her friend but when she sent that message to me, I was shocked.
You don't know how far your demonstration of love, no matter how small you might think it is can go. You don't know the potential of any relationship until you are willing to let go of the fear of being rejected and do what you feel led to do for a person. Because let's be honest, people can take your show of love to them for granted, but does that mean you should stop? No!what is the essence of life without love? If everyone decides to hold back because of past hurt or disappointment, trust me, this world would be a dark place, darker than it already is.
Above all, never forget that God is love, and he has sent Jesus, his son to die on the cross, no greater love hath a person than that.
Even though you decide to cut ties with everyone, please never disconnect yourself from the power house of love himself, God, through Jesus Christ our Lord and a continuous fellowship with the Holy Spirit.
Don't think I wrote this because I am perfect, I personally believe I suck at keeping friends, but this is what I feel God has been teaching me, to be thoughtful and not hold back.
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